Saying Goodbye April 13, 2010

Caitlyn Placing a Flower on Papa Fred's Grave

Small Memory of Papa Fred at his home church in Tampa, Fl.

Papa worked maintanence at the church until literally the day he could not get out of bed because of a neck injury in 2006.

Papa and Grandmas Resting Place

On Tuesday April 13th, 2010, Papa Fred passed away around 10 am. The week before was Spring Break. The Friday before Easter, Papa was admitted to the hospital for heart problems. We received the call Saturday afternoon. We continued to check on Papa throughout Sunday. He was told he was going to need a stint for his heart and his kidneys were not doing very well. Papa was refusing treatment and had signed a DNR (Do Not Resuscitate) awhile back. He said he was tired and wanted to be with Mama ( Grandma Rose) It has been 8 long years that she passed away and he has been so lonely for her every since. I can't blame him but for selfish reasons I wanted him here with us. It makes me so sad to think that Caitlyn will never remember him and Chandler and Connor will only have vague memories.

We had our beach trip scheduled for that week leaving on Tuesday morning. I decided to take the kids to see Papa Fred and say goodbye just in case. I didn't want to think the worst but I didn't want to take that chance. So Monday morning we got up and headed to the VA hospital in Durham. Papa was in so much pain. He cried that he didn't want the kids to see him that way but he was glad we came too. We gave him little Debbie strawberry shortcakes. Which will do in a pinch when you can't make it to Parksdale for a real one. Papa loved his strawberry milkshakes. LOL As we hugged Papa goodbye, he said, "I'm really going to miss you girl!" I didn't really think that would be the last time that I saw him. He was doing better when we left. However, I did tell him to kiss my baby for me and to give Grandma Rose a big hug and a kiss for me.

We did go on our trip to the beach in St. Simons Island in Georgia. It was amazing. We loved it. I can't wait to go back. We came home Sunday the 10th. Around 6pm, an hour after we got home and unloaded the truck, Robin called and told Shane that Papa was doing worse and he better come. So Shane packed and left to go see Papa. He stayed until Monday night and came home with the intent to work a day and then go back and be with his Dad and Papa. Shane's brother Chad and his wife Marcella drove up Monday night straight thru from Florida and got to Durham around 8 am. They were singing a song. Shane had called Robin 5 minutes before to check on Papa. Robin called back and said Papa had passed.

The boys were heartbroken. It is their first Grandparent to pass away that they were actually close to and knew. We picked up the kids from school and drove up to be with Shane's family. Shane helped his parents with trying to make arrangements for the funeral, which would be in Tampa, FL. We drove to Florida on Thursday, Friday Shane and his parents met with the funeral director to finalize everything. Saturday was the funeral. It was the hardest funeral that I have ever had to attend. To watch the boys crying their little hearts out was heartbreaking to say the least. When Robin was up practicing his song for the funeral and he saw his grandsons crying was just too much. He came down and sat beside them and just cried.

Robin, Marcella and her mom along with Chad playing the bass sang the song done recently by Alan Jackson "I want to Walk all over Heaven with You". They barely made it thru but it was beautiful. I read a poem and sobbed thru the whole thing. I wanted to say more but just could not say the words.

So Papa Thank you for all the beautiful memories you have given me and my family. The trips to Parksdale & Plant City, deviled crabs and Potatoes and Tropicanna, taking the boys to the Zoo but most of all for loving me as if I was your very own flesh and blood. I could not have loved you more if you were. Thank you for the legacy you have left for my children and for being such wonderful constant in our lives. Shane is the man he is today in part because of the Grandfather that you were to him. You are missed already so much.

All my Love Your Girl,

Rachael