The Battle Worth Fighting

As I sit here in my 2nd chemotherapy, it can be a little depressing looking around at the sickness that surrounds me. It is easy to dwell on the negative of the situation instead of thanking God for all the good in my life. Shane is sitting here by my side as he has from the very beginning of all of this. I think more than anything him taking off work to be with me means so much. Anyone who knows Shane knows his work ethic, knows he does not miss work for anything & for him to not be at work is a lot for him. It is just a gesture from him to me that says more than any words could.

I was able to use my port for the first time today. They spray a numbing solution on the skin where they will insert the needle into the port. It is so cold that it numbs your skin. Then they stab you in the port and you are ready to go. It just feels like a very small prick. So much better than being stuck 3 times just to get started. My hemoglobin levels are still very good. So I am very happy & thankful about that. Sometimes they seemed surprised at the good reports but I just continue to think, I serve a big God & they don't know how many prayers are going up on my behalf. Again, the bigger the battle-the bigger the victory. So today is victory in Jesus Name.

I have to go for now. It is time for my ice cold finger bath. Yeah!!!! LOL BRRRR!!!

I am done with one of my meds, now starting herceptin & then one more to go. It is now almost 12 noon. Shane has gone to get lunch for us at a BBQ Place called Max's. Sounds good & I can't wait to try it. It was recommended by one of the Dr.'s here. She said it is like a biker hang out which is right up Shane's alley. Although with the weather today it is probably not that busy with bikers. We are going to try ourselves to go on a weekend bike trip soon. We wanted to go last weekend but it was rainy here & snowy in the mountains. So that was that. Word on the street is that my Father in law has acquired a new Gold Wing. Now I hope Shane does not get any bright ideas from that. We shall see.

I am still feeling really good. Too good for having breast cancer & going thru chemo. It is crazy because if I didn't know better I would never know that I am "sick". I am grateful that I am not sick but it makes this whole experience surreal.

Sunday the Youth Pastor, Jon Hernandez, talked about Miracles Worth Fighting For. It was really inspiring as he broke down the different things that affect us & our encounter with God. If you truly have an encounter with God, it is going to change you. You won't stay the same. Your "walk" will be different! If it isn't you need to find alone time/"wrestling time" with God until you become different. The best quote he said that meant a lot to me was this: "God doesn't want to take who you are & make it better, but to take who you were, discard it & make you new." Wow what a thought!! I think I have even said on my blog, "I hope this will make me a "better" person." But what I found out was that I want God to use this "journey" to make me a "Different person" NOT just a "Better person"!! Another thought he shared with us it how it will change our generations to come. And my kids are the biggest reason for me to fight this "battle" & WIN! But to think that as much as I am fighting this earthly battle how much more should I fight for the spiritual welfare of my children & grandchildren & their kids that I might never even know. I am so thankful for my spiritual heritage & in this day in age I will have to fight even harder to pass it on to my children.

Thanks Pastor Jon for an awesome heart felt message. I loved the prayer time together at the end. It was kind of a way to consecrate all that we had heard to ourselves and with others around us. Keep up the awesome job you are doing with the Youth. May God give you all the desires of your heart for your faithful service & devotion to him. I am a walking miracle that "God still anwers prayers" I think it is sometimes easier for us to tell others that when we are not in it, but as someone is going "thru" it to another "Never Give Up" God will give you the desires of your hearts, he will make your path straight, & be that light that sometimes you feel has burned out. I have found that "God's" answer is not always what we think it should be, but he will always answer, guide you, & give you the strenghth you never knew you had to go "thru" it. Just like the Oak Tree that I posted a few nights ago. That really touched me and I hope if you read it, it will minister to you in some small way. Thanks again for speaking the Word of God from your heart. Awesome God!! Awesome Word!!!

After chemo today, I am going to a "Look Good, Feel Good" class. They give you tips for tying scarves, applying make up for your eyebrows when you lose them, and other great things. So I am really excited about that. They even give you free makeup. Yeah!! Anyone want to go. Too bad you have to have cancer first. LOL JK. I will let you all know how it goes after the class. It is from 3-5 pm. I am also going to the class with a friend who I met in chemo. So that should be fun. Gotta go for now.