Here is an adorable picture of CaityBug with my hat on. She is mine,but she is so cute. Those big blue eyes like her Daddy. She is such a lovebug. I just thought this would make you smile because it did me.
I have been thinking lately about me getting cancer. One of my thought is about my precious baby girl that I feel like I have waited all my life for. For as far back as I can remember all I have wanted to be was a mom and to at least have 1 little girl. I could never picture my future without one. I just knew God would answer my prayers someday. And even after I had a miscarriage before Caitlyn Rose, I still knew God would answer my heartfelt lifelong prayer to have a baby girl. And he did. I finally have my little girl. I know now how my mom must have felt as she held me in her arms. All the dreams, wishes & desires you have for this child that God has so richly blessed you with all bundled up in this little person.
My thoughts lately have led me to wonder "What if this would have happened when I was pregnant with Caitlyn?" "Maybe God waited till I had my lifelong prayer answered." I am so thankful that he did see fit to bless me with this beautiful child who makes me laugh everyday. She is truly my sunshine during this not so bright time in our lives. I love to see how she looks at Shane as he walks thru the door with those big adoring eyes and shouts, "DaDa!!" when she hears the door open and runs to him.
There is just something special about Daddies and their little girls. I am very grateful for both of mine. I think they both did a pretty good job of raising me. God must have thought I was going to be a handful and thought I needed a double dose or something. They are totally different but love me for who I am. I love you both. Thank you for making me the lady, mom, daughter, wife, & sister that I am today. I love you Dad. I love you Tony! Thank you for what you have instilled in me because that is what makes me what I am today.
So today amidst all the hustle & bustle of life. Which today included helping mom unpack,still. How can one person have so much stuff???? I shampooed the carpets in the living room which desperately needed it after a weekend of movers, kids & dogs & snow. Isabella came over for a while so Yesenia could run a few errands and not have her out in the cold. (She has been sick for about a week with a cold/congestion) And the boys were home from school again because of the snow which they still had spelling & reading homework to do so they would not be behind and have to do a lot the rest of the week. (Mean Mommy, I know) I also cooked Turkey Cutlets for dinner and of course a load or 2 of laundry. (A must)
My point is that even with all of this I knew I needed to take time out to spend with the boys and Caitlyn. Life is so precious and they all are growing up too fast. The boys and I sat down and read a chapter book together about a Ghost Town. It was fun and they were practicing their reading. After dinner, I gave Caitlyn an extra long bath just because she likes too. And hey what else is so important that I just have to be doing? Nothing!!! She sat on the floor and read her books about Dora and Melmo(Elmo) as she calls it. And tried to sing, "Tinkle Tinkle" Little star!! I rocked her longer than I had to or than I normally do, just because. It didn't matter that there is still a load of laundry in the dryer , the playroom is not perfectly clean, there are still dishes to dry on the counter from dinner, & mom's office is still a disaster. Because as I sat there rocking my baby girl, all is right with me, my family, & the world. And Life Truly Does Go On!!!!
All my Love,
Rachael Renea
Hey Rach,
ReplyDeleteI read today's blog and it brought tears to my eyes! I'm so proud of you and I love you so very much. You are such a good mom! I know that is something most people probably already know about you but truly you exemplify a mothers love! God knew He could trust those precious souls (and they are so very precious) in your care! What a compliment He paid you!
Love you, stay strong and be encouraged!!!
Read this and thought of you.
In the same way I was with Moses, I'll be with you. I won't give up on you; I won't leave you. Strength! Courage! You are going to lead this people to inherit the land that I promised to give their ancestors. Give it everything you have, heart and soul. Make sure you carry out The Revelation that Moses commanded you, every bit of it. Don't get off track, either left or right, so as to make sure you get to where you're going. And don't for a minute let this Book of The Revelation be out of mind. Ponder and meditate on it day and night, making sure you practice everything written in it. Then you'll get where you're going; then you'll succeed. Haven't I commanded you? Strength! Courage! Don't be timid; don't get discouraged. God, your God, is with you every step you take."
I know exactly how you feel. Lexi was the same age as Caitlyn when I had cancer and it is in this time of their lives when the laundry and dishes really don't matter. All you have to worry about is being the loving mom you are. The dishes will still be there, but everyday, the answers to your prayers: Chandler, Connor and Caitlyn will grow. And from day 1, they are created to learn to grow up and be independent of you...hold on to every precious moment that you can.
ReplyDeleteI am so proud of you and Shane and the life you created and are able to share with your treasures. Stay strong, remember "the battle belongs to the Lord".
love ya lots
Quality time with your children/family... sooo important. Glad you're doing as well as you are. Still praying. Take care...
ReplyDelete